perfectteatime

Oh! Yes, I would like that very much. I will be over, please let me know where to find you.

That's fair! I think there's a map or something on this device but I'm not sure how to pull that up.
So I guess I'll just write you some directions. Will that work?

Yes that will be fine.

You got it! Okay just a minute

[There are some directions written out. Less about street names and more along the lines of landmarks, but the general idea is there. You can't miss the emerald statue of the dogs high-fiving, honestly.]

[ It takes Byleth a little longer to get there than he would have expected. He gets turned around a few times, but the directions Ashe gave hold up, and no, you really can't miss the emerald statue of the dogs high-fiving.

At last, he is at Ashe's door, knocking his usual soft tap-tap-tap. ]

Ah! Coming!

[Eagerly, Ashe comes to the door and swings it open.]

Hello, Professor! Come on in.

Certainly, thank you.

[ The place is cozy looking. Even though he hasn't been here long, Ashe had a way of making any space distinctively his own. It's pleasing. ]

Well then, what shall we make?

[It's perfect for one, maybe two people, but Ashe certainly isn't going to be able to be hosting a bit party anytime soon. At the moment, he's happy to just have the both of them.]

I wanted to try to make those dumplings. The recipe's actually not that hard, we just need to be careful about frying them. I'm still getting used to all of these devices, honestly... but I feel better knowing you're here.

What do you think? Shall we give it a try?

I don't know if you should take solace in my presence- I know even less about them.

But I think between the two of us we will be able to get something done.

Don't be like that. You make everyone feel more confident in what they do, even if you're just encouraging.

[Fortunately, Ashe seems to more or less have an idea on what he's doing, the recipe written out and on the counter. Other than being startled by the flame of the stove -- he isn't sure he'll ever get used to it -- he shows Byleth what he wants done: making the fillings and wrapping the dumplings, then they need to be fried.

The first couple are a little crispier than desired, but the ones that follow end up closer to being right.]

Ah, sorry there's not a ton of room. I hope you don't mind just sitting next to me as we eat!

That was fun, though.

[ It's nice to cook with Ashe again, just as they did before in Garreg Mach, it's like a little piece of home away from home. Strange that- he's not sure when he started thinking of the monastery as home.

He settles in next to Ashe, giving his shoulder a friendly bump with his own. ]

Oh no, sitting next to Ashe. Anything but that. [ His tone is soft and wry, the familiar subtle cheekiness that he often carried in more candid moments. ]

It was, I quite enjoyed it. I'm going to enjoy eating these even more though, I think.

[That makes him laugh softly, ducking his head at the gentle teasing. It's harmless, but he does appreciate the reassurance that his company is enjoyed.]

I think so, too. Getting it from a restaurant can be fun, but making it with your friends is special.

[The dumplings did turn out well! Sure the first few are a bit crispy but the flavor is still there. It's hard to not just inhale it all, truth be told.]

Ah, Professor... I wanted to ask.

Have you tried Synchrony with anyone yet?

I prefer the food cooked by you by far.

[ He's eating slower today, trying to savor it. ]

Hm? No- I have not. I suppose I haven't really thought about it much. Why?

Haha! You're always so kind.

[Ashe sets down his fork, trying to think about how he wants to phrase it. Eventually, he works up the nerve, despite how flushed his face becomes.]

If... it's something we have to do, then I suppose I'd feel more comfortable asking someone I know. Someone I trust and feel comfortable with, like you, Professor. That is, if it's not too much to ask.

Oh-!

[ He smiles softly, feeling a faint blush coming to his cheeks as well. Hmm. Sharing one's mind? He wonders if it would be similar to how it was, having Sothis with him all the time. ]

Well, I'm very flattered you feel that comfortable with me. I am not quite sure how it will be, but I would be happy to, if you want.

[ He folds his hands together in thought. ] How should we go about this?

I'm, uh. Not too sure.

[There's a soft, nervous laugh. Goddess, what would it even be like, sharing his mind and emotions with Byleth? Then again, it could be interesting insight; Byleth always seemed to keep to himself in a lot of ways. His expressions were always subtle, or... no, more like he didn't always know how to show them. Subdued, maybe.]

We could try holding hands first?

All right.

[ Byleth hooks a finger under the wrist of his glove and peels it off, offering his hand to the archer. ]

Shall we then?

All right. Thank you for doing this with me.

[In return, Ashe does much the same, removing his gloves first. It's out of habit that he still wears them, even though he hasn't needed to really for awhile. There's a pause as he hesitates, but then Ashe works up the nerve to take Byleth's hand into his own.

At first, there's the jittery, anxious emotion from Ashe, as one might expect, but it quickly calms down into heartwarming fondness, relief that his teacher is here. There's a brief memory flitting by, Ashe as a student with Byleth helping adjust his archer stance while practicing, how Ashe's face went bright red at the praise he received and the humbled laughter following.]

[ He was concerned that he would not really know how, but things seem to just flow into him as soon as they touch. Ashe's hand is warm and heavy in his. The anxiety feels prickly, but as soon as it smooths out, everything else floods in. At least it feels like a flood.

It's powerful. Like it was with Dimitri, but different. A different kind of warmth. Almost nostalgic, but maybe that's the memory that wriggles its way into his head. He remembers it as well, but form a different angle. In return, Ashe gets... oddly very little, at least it seems like that at first. It's quieter, so incredibly subdued but it's there. A low whisper of thoughts and feelings, and then the occasional spike, blinding and intense, leaving echoes behind.

If Ashe listens closely though, everything is identifiable. Curiosity, nervousness, fondness, pride, love.

His hand tightens around Ashe's. ]

[It's so odd, but it seems like it suits Byleth this way. How quiet it is at first, then the sudden spike of emotions, thoughts, and familiarity. That and...

Love. Love comes in so many forms. Ashe thinks about how he'd come to bond with the Professor, how slowly he watched the former mercenary warm up to his students. How much more he saw those little smiles, his brows going up just so. Watching Byleth fish for his students, sharing pieces with the cats and dogs around the monastery.

Love. How Ashe feels about his friends, the bonds he's made. His younger brother and sister, who are still at Gaspard, safe as possible. Gaspard, where Lonato adopted him. Lonato--

There's grief there. Of course there is. The sudden burning memory of Lonato raising his javelin, ready to throw at Annette. Tears burning in Ashe's eyes as he releases his arrow and puts down his adopted father.]

Ah-- no. I'm sorry. That's--

[No no, he needs to think of something better than that! The Professor has been through enough! He tries to crawl back to better memories, but it's hard.]

Edited 2021-03-07 03:58 (UTC)

[ The idea of being known like this, Byleth should have expected it to be a mix of things. Bitter sweet. He's not wholly surprised when Ashe goes down the path he does. He watched it happen, the anguish that Ashe felt... he wishes he could have kept it from him. It didn't have to be him to do it.

I understand. In that sea of grief, there's his own too. Losing Jeralt. Different but similar.

He pulls Ashe in to lean against him, placing a hand on the back of his head, a comforting gesture he'd learned from Jeralt. He'd always do that when Byleth would get hurt as a child. ]

Shhh. It's fine.

[ He realizes he's shaking with the overwhelm of emotions, and he can feel Ashe's tears in that memory prickling at his own eyes. ]

I...

[It's a mixture of everything. When they returned to the monastery, Ashe in his room, sobbing and screaming into his pillow. He knows why, but he still asks himself: why wasn't I enough, Lonato? But there's the muted feeling from Byleth in return, some understanding. Because he lost his father, too.

Ashe buries his face into Byleth's shoulder, letting out a shaky breath, squeezing his teacher's hand.]

I'm sorry. I don't know why this came up. It's been nearly six years, and I still...

It's okay.

Don't fight it.

[ He doesn't mind, even the sharp sadness. It allows him to know Ashe better, in the end. Even if it threatens to knock him over. It's strange, answering pain with pain. At first his own is muted, as always, but the memory of Jeralt dying in his arms becomes crystalized, sharp, one of the "bright spots" of emotion, as he'd taken to calling them. Searing and clear. It lasted longer than anything else he'd ever felt.

Ashe will find, while Byleth was much more quiet, more subdued, his reaction was much the same. Laying in his room for so long, tears soaking into his pillow. There is one distinct thing that comes through it though-

You are not alone, Ashe. ]

[He can't stop his own tears, not when he suddenly feels Byleth's grief. Ashe hadn't watched it happen, but Dimitri had found their professor in the rain. He had not described Byleth's state then out of a sense of respect, but this... this is what he was feeling. Experiencing. So often in many ways, Byleth's expressions are like washed out colors, then suddenly there is vibrancy. This is one of them.

Ashe sniffs, rubbing his eyes with one hand.

Neither are you. You can count on me.]

[ The pain, intense as it was, slowly starts to ebb, and Byleth smooths his hand down Ashe's back. He can feel his own cheeks wet with a few tears that were wrenched free during the exchange.

Easy does it. He lets his mind drift back, after everything, to the warmth of returning to class. Everyone's kindness, and Dimitri's gentle words to him. Take your time. It's definitely a bitter-sweet feeling. ]

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